How I almost Killed Two Kids Last Night

I was returning from seeing ‘The Proposition’ last night with Eboni, driving North on S. Winooski. I pulled up to the stop sign at either Maple or King, not sure- one block from Main. There was a skater bro shirtless holding a board running around stopping traffic, I was like ‘what is this idiot doing?’ just thinking he was fucking around- drunk high whatevs. So I looked around, no traffic, and started to go when all of a sudden- on my right side- screaming down the hill- come two fucking idiot sonsabitches on skateboards… I slammed on my brakes- only about 5 feet into the intersection- and seriously came about 18 inches of taking those two dumb fucks out. The traffic director guy yelled ‘what are you doing!!??’ and when I drove off he pointed to his head and said ‘think safe!’ my witty retort? ‘you think safe, ASSHOLE!!!!!’

Now I’m all for skateboarding, and being cool and rebelling and thrill seeking and teen angst and hating your parents or whatever silly trip these guys are on but just don’t do it at 9:30pm when its dark out and at least have the guy come over to my window and say ‘hey, skaters are coming through here, hold up a bit would you?’ yes I would, gladly.

So in conclusion, FUCK THOES ASSHOLES THAT FREAKED ME OUT TO NO END AND WHO PROBABLY DON’T KNOW HOW FUCKING CLOSE THEY CAME TO GETTING KIA’D TO DEATH!

JB